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Howard Weinerman/Quotes
* "My best friend's the Ninja! Oh, this is incredible!" – "Last Stall on the Left" * "What is that, a bicycle with one wheel? Come back when you have two wheels and a regular guy's shoes!" – "Last Stall on the Left" * "You're a freak, you know that?" – "Last Stall on the Left" * "Finally feels good to be out of that humiliating body paint." – "Got Stank?" * "You can still make us the first freshmen in the Fish Cage, Cunningham. I believe in you. (yawning) Being inspirational sure wipes me out." (taking a nap) – "Got Stank?" * "Cunningham, don't be so hard on yourself; this isn't your fault." – "Got Stank?" * "Off – my – stage!" – "So U Think U Can Stank" * "We're good: it's robot!" – "McFists of Fury" * "Viceroy's got style." – "Dawn of the Driscoll" * "Cunningham, do you realize how incredibly stupid it would be for us... not to do that?!" * "We're going to give you a second chance to give us a second chance." * "Let's see what nerd-ball Kang is rocking here..." * "Stupid Cunningham reunites the band just to break it up again." * "He killed the snack-bar. You make him pay, Ninja! You make him pay!" * "You know I can't keep a secret, and it's not like I ever asked if you were the ninja — you just told me." * "Well, thanks for nothing, Cunningham; now I can't eat the tacos... nah, I'm still gonna eat the tacos." * "Sister, please, they don't call me 'Double Dip' just because I like ice cream." – "Gossip Boy" * "It occurs to me I don't have a limo." – "Gossip Boy" * "All you had to do is prance your pony two L's to the right, and you would've had him! Now why do I yell this stuff out if nobody's gonna listen?!" – "Stanks Like Teen Spirit" * "Toilet, I know I've done some unspeakable things to you, but this time you went TOO FAR!" * "Donkeys can't hold hammers." * "Dates. Dates are for dudes who don't have bros to play vids with." – "Sorcerer in Love" * "I thought Bash had it for sure. That ham was a stunner." – "Sorcerer in Love" * "Your Nomicon's ringing. I think you have to take that." – "Sorcerer in Love" * "Have fun not finding the most beautiful thing in school. Which is what I'll be doing while you're in the... (Randy enters the Nomicon, being pushed into the locker by its force)... Nomicon" – "Sorcerer in Love" * "It is also full of ancient bird demon that possessed me, remember!" – "Sorcerer in Love" * "She's all yours, Cunningham." – "Sorcerer in Love" * "Cunningham, we can never let a girl come between us again. Deal?" – "Sorcerer in Love" * "I BREAK EVERYTHING I TOUCH!!!! STOP TOUCHING ME! ''" * "And yet, all it says is 'Hero.' Medals don't lie, Cunningham." – "Sorcerer in Love 2: The Sorceress's Revenge" * "My sister's a demon dog. (''Gasping. '') You know, I'd be lying if I said I hadn't suspected." – "Sorcerer in Love 2: The Sorceress's Revenge" * "Hi, I'm Howard! I'll be your hero this evening." – "Sorcerer in Love 2: The Sorceress's Revenge" * "Relax, everybody! You're in good hands: mine. Though they may be delicate, they will lead you to safety!" – "Sorcerer in Love 2: The Sorceress's Revenge" * (when Bucky holds his hand) "Wow, those are some sweaty mitts you got there." – "Sorcerer in Love 2: The Sorceress's Revenge" * "Listen up, people, I'm your hero, which means you do what I say, and I say we're going this way." (Bucky: "That's a bottomless pit…") "Then we're going the other way." – "Sorcerer in Love 2: The Sorceress's Revenge" * "This is it, right through this tunnel is — aww, more cave…" – "Sorcerer in Love 2: The Sorceress's Revenge" * (''to Theresa) "Nah, I'm sure we'll find him crying in some tunnel on the way out which is this way…" (Randy: "Other way…") "Other way!" – "Sorcerer in Love 2: The Sorceress's Revenge" * "How's full-Nomicon tastin'?" – "Shloomp! There It Is!" * "'No-Nomicon' is the Cheese!" – "Shloomp! There It Is!" * (angrily) "My sister, '' Cunningham? Remember when I said I liked you going 'no Nomicon?' I take it back! DO – NOT – LIKE IT!" – "Shloomp! There It Is!" * (''to Nomicon, angrily) "Tell me what you did to my friend, or I'm gonna take you for a walk down the back of my pants!" – "Shloomp! There It Is!" * (to Nomicon while falling into it) "I HATE YOU!!!" – "Shloomp! There It Is!" * "I'm in the NinjaNomicon. So, my old enemy, we finally meet.” (looking around the Nomicon) Hmm… pretty roomy for a book." – "Shloomp! There It Is!" * "Hey, if you're here, who's up there? " – "Shloomp! There It Is!" * (relieved) "Man, I am so glad that it wasn't you who hit on my sister. I did not wanna have that talk." – "Shloomp! There It Is!" * "This is what you guys do in here?" – "Shloomp! There It Is!" * "Why is there so much garbage back here?" – "Shloomp! There It Is!" * "Ow, that hurt to the bottom of my feet! GAH!" * "Seriously! I never wanna do that again! Promise me, Cunningham!" * "And every time I go to the bathroom I will remember you, Plop Plop." – "Randy Cunningham: 13th Century Ninja" * (to Randy) "Speaking of, let's get back to the portal; I gotta take a '21st century,' if you know what I mean." – "Randy Cunningham: 13th Century Ninja" * "But whining makes it feel better!" * "You better recognize, Doug!" – "Let the Wonk One In" * "Time to find out which one of you candy-bars has the almonds to enter." – "Let the Wonk One In" * "That's how you 'do the 'Ween,' Rachel!" – "Let the Wonk One In" * "Shut – your – wonkin’ – hole, – Doug!" – "The Curse of Mudfart" * "Really, Doug? You just ruined Halloween! Hey, if anybody asks, 'Who ruined Halloween?' tell 'em Doug did!" – "The Curse of Mudfart" * "Stop! Stop! Stop! The only thing more boring than your dreams's when your dreams' dreams have dreams!" – "Ninjception" * "Look at us...workin' together... me, savin' the Game Hole... you, doin' whatever it is you sidekicks do..." – "Happy Hanukkah, Howard Weinerman" * "He knows where he was—nobody asked you, Doug." – "The Brawn Also Rises" * "Yeah, I've seen the title sequence." – "The Brawn Also Rises" * "Time to yank the mask off the Fake-a-Cabra!" – "The Brawn Also Rises" * "I really want to yank it!" – "The Brawn Also Rises" * "Just destank him. I'm sticky in places I shouldn't be sticky." – "The Brawn Also Rises" * (laughing) "Oh, my favorite part was when he yelled at Doug." – "The Brawn Also Rises" * "No, she thinks we're the opposite of 'furiating.'" (Both look at Theresa, who sighs romantically at Randy.) – "The Brawn Also Rises" * "No 'free-fills?' This isn't a buffet; IT'S A CAFETERIA!" – "Club Ninja-dise" * "Don't get mushy on me, kid. This juice is about to get real." – "To Smell and Back" * "Don't you do it! Don't you fall in love with me." – "To Smell and Back" * "Let's not start juicing each other's cheese just yet." – "To Smell and Back" * "Say what you want, I just shut down the Nomicon." – "Big Trouble in Little Norrisville" Category:Character Quotes Category:Main Characters Category:Howard Weinerman Information